LONDON — The Cabinet Office confirmed Monday that the position of Prime Minister has been formally reclassified as a consumable office supply comparable to toner. Under new procurement guidelines, leaders are now issued temporarily and incinerated once their approval ratings drop below 30 percent. "We just swap them out when they jam," said Permanent Secretary Ian Thistlethwaite. "Politics is temporary; the memo format is forever."
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.

Cabinet Office Reclassifies Prime Minister As Disposable Toner Cartridge
Expert Weighs In
“We just swap them out when they jam. Politics is temporary; the memo format is forever.”
⚠️ Satirical article. Expert quotes are fictional.


